Tag Archives: Insensitivity

Men can cry & here’s why

Standard

Allah states:

“Allah doesn’t burden any Soul, except it being tolerable.” & “Verily, with Hardship is Ease.”
(Noble-Qur’ān: Chpt.2, V.286; Chpt.94, V.5)

Muhammad (Peace be upon them) stated that any/all Things which afflict any Muslim is used, via Allah, to remove Sins: even Psycho-Emotional Trauma.
(an-Nawawī)

Negative/Toxic-Encounter via Chaplaincy

I remember visiting one of my Hospital-Patients…they were very overjoyed to be visited. They began expressing/verbalizing ash-Shukr/Gratitude, for being alive still & surviving their Medical-Ordeal. They then began to weep&cry. But, sadly, however: the Spouse of the Patient…they began berating the Grief of the Patient saying: “Don’t cry…stop crying…why’re you crying?!!! You’re a Man…so stop crying!!!”. Albeit, it wasn’t my Place interfere between the Husband&Wife Spousal-Dialogue: I was taken aback & equally highly disturbed.

This-Woman audaciously/arrogantly telling This-Man to not freely express themselves, under the Pseudo-Auspicies that Self-Expression is “Feminine”, “Unmanly”, etc.: that I found very problematic. This is a Commomplace-Reality which Countless-Men all across the Earth have been facing historically. This Mythos/Pseudo-Narrative, that a Man self-expressing one’s True-Emotions/Feelings is “Weakness” is utterly ridiculous, highly insensitive, apathetic, etc. And, what’s worse is that so/too many Men have fully embraced this Sifah/Dimension of Pseudo-Masculinity which pontificates/claims that Men whom manifest Emotions are “Weaklings”, “Incels”, “Beta-Males”, etc.-It’s the Typical Fake-Woke Rhetorical-Bullshit which disables an Important-Compoment of as-Sihah/Wellness: the Capability, Ability, Agency, etc. to freely express one’s Emotions in a Healthy-Way (without Fear of Judgmentalism being imposed upon them).

Misogyny via “Red-Pillism” is not the Solution

Male-Pain which is astronomically ignored

I personally/professionally have spoken with & counseled Countless-Men whom’re made to think/feel they’re “Less of a Man”, for expressing their True-Emotions & Life-Challenges. It’s actually Women particularly, whom’re Experts of Emasculation: Certain-Women will immediately accuse Men of the proverbial “Actin like a Bitch” if/when any Man self-expresses their True-Emotions. It’s truly pathetic, the Levels of Apathy imposed upon Men & the Discouragement against Men being Psycho-Emotionally in tune with themselves.

The Scars of Men

The Mockery of Men being Emotionally-Equipped, to deal with their Life-Challenges, is literally amongst the Many-Reasons how/why Men die via Suicide-Attempts 4-Times more than Women (in spite of Women attempting Suicide 3-Times more than Men). Even the Concept of Men’s Mental-Health isn’t taken seriously (or as seriously as it must/should be taken). Men go through Fitn/Traumatic-Scenarios just like Women. How/why do our Societies still push the Mythos that Men don’t have Psycho-Emotional Huqūq/Rights?!!! This Constant/Consistent-Pushback against Male Mental-Health has yielded Negative/Toxic-Consequences for Centuries without any End.

The Anatomy of Quitting on one’s Self

Things which Men feel Powerless to disclose

The Men whom I’ve engaged/counseled, truly think/feel that they’ve no one to turn to & listen to them, empathize with them, support them, etc. They’re constantly/consistently unjustly expected to be “Work-Horses”. Even for Certain-Men to express what they’ve experienced: immediately they’re bombarded with the “Don’t act like a Bitch.”/”Stop acting like a Bitch.” Rhetoric via Women & ironically even Other-Men. There’s Men I’ve counseled who’ve been Gang-Raped via Jail/Prison, Sexually-Abused via Childhood/Adolescence, Sexually-Assaulted via Workplace, Religiously-Abused via Religio-Figures, Domestically-Abused via their Spouses/Significant-Others, Bullied throughout the Entirety of their Lives, etc. And, they’ve few if any Persons whom actually take their Pain seriously. This Sense of Deflection must cease at any/all Costs.

Returning to the Original-Narrative concerning the Hospital-Patient

The Patient, clearly observing their Body-Language, was observant that I understood the Assignment. Meaning, that regardless of what their Goofy-Ass Wife was talking about…I was present with them: willing to listen to their Narrative & unwilling to ignore/deflect their Expressed-Pain. They understood that I was there to empathize with & support them. The Patient constantly/consistently thanked me for being present with them, as they expressed/verbalized their Challenges&Problems which mattered to them. And I’m evergrateful to Allah, that I was present for That-Person.

Gareth Bryant